If You Give A Homeless Woman Eye Contact

If you give a homeless woman eye contact, she’ll hold up her cardboard sign
When she holds up her sign, you’re going to read it
When you read the sign, you will know she wants a ham sandwich

If you have a ham sandwich, you’re going to give it to her
Then, she’s going to see your leftover cheeseburger
If she sees the leftover cheeseburger, she’s going to want it

She won’t care that you’ve already taken a bite out of it
You’re going to give her the cheeseburger
When you give her the cheeseburger, she’s going to see the sandwich tupperware

She’ll say “That’s what I really need.”
But you can’t give her the tupperware because it belongs to your roommate
If she still has two sandwiches, she’s going to be thankful

If she’s thankful, you’ll be happy
If you’re happy, you will hold your head high
Of course, when you hold your head high, you make eye contact with homeless women

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