Unsexy Shorts

High-waisted, acid wash shorts
An atrocity from mother’s closet
Some fashions should stay in the grave

The kind where a woman’s midriff shows
And the high upper-thigh hems are tattered and frayed

Donned by a young girl with a flattering frame
Make no mistake; She was not a lady
When she felt discomfort from her shorts’ position
She picked at her ass, which resembled the 80’s

Twice she plucked with much lack of grace
Her efforts failing; She did not succeed
Resorting to, I assume, her last attempt
She shoved her entire forearm down her jeans

This sidewalk was public and on the move
It did not deter her from reaching down
She did not stop or step aside
An undie adjustment for all those around

She waddled her way across the street
While her hand slide the seam down ’round the bum
That should hold her until it bunches again
And the thong-like unfolding would once more be done

From her scanty ensemble, I would’ve believed
Her appearance was of utmost priority
To undo the flirtation does not seem fitting
Least of all with a very unsexy wedge-picking


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